Monthly Archives: February 2009

unstoppable praying

unstoppable praying
unstoppable praying – by sarahsita hendry(bday 27th feb) on Polyvore.com

Dear God,
I don’t know how to express how blessed I am. I’ll be 21 a plenty of hours later, and it’s a mercy for me. You have been giving so many special things since I was born, and I can’t stop thanking u for all these.
As my wishes, I don’t need any material gifts, all I need is u, God. Please always stand beside me, to face this crazy life, to make myself worth as a person, to make everyone who loves me to proud of me, and to warn me that I have to always remember you.
Thank you so much for everything, makes me think that I’m the best creature on earth. you make my day, you make my life. you make me strong, with everything’s happened. you want me to survive, because you know i can, even though i think i can’t, but show me, and don’t want me to wait too long. i give myself to you, only you.

Amen.

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not too important.

Hey hey, laziest person is here. Don’t ask who. I am. Yes, me.. I’m the laziest person on earth, when my birthday will be coming up, when I’m going on 21, when my exam wait me, I just do nothing that related to my lesson (study, summarize, even TOUCH THE BOOK!!!). haaaah, what kind of student am i? Student with no awareness, student who prefer to open her facebook than read her handout.
Doh, ya Allah, please forgive me for all my idiocies, i wish I could control the pressure to retard, but F, this short semester sent me craziness. Let me analyze, maybe I’m bored, is it normal to be bored on 6th semester? No? yeah I think so. Ah, whatever! Stop yawning and go open your book!!! Nooo, back off, books!

after the thrill's gone
after the thrill’s gone – by sarahsita hendry(bday 27th feb) on Polyvore.com

see the picture above (created by me but it’s not the point!), that’s a lady, laying in sofa and smoking, suddenly she falls asleep, not because she’s tired, but because she’s lazy. guess who!? me of course, who else?! LOL.

ugh, i have to get over it before i’m late!! come on girl, whup whup whup!!!!

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homework from Neno

well, so far, this is the most difficult homework i’ve ever done. woow, but i’m glad to finish it, i thank neno for tagging me!

Here are the rules..

  1. To each letter of an alphabet, write a word connected to you.
  2. Tag 6 (six) people.

ok, let’s start!!

Adit is my twin brother’s nickname.

Be more mature day by day is my-forever-wish.

Chicken strips from California Fried Chicken (CFC) are my favorite junk food, and the only kind of junk food I love…

Don’t try to scream me all over my face or I’ll get your life worse.. if you’re angry to me, just tell me in a friendly way, I’ll be gentle to confess and apologize.

Economics is my high school’s subject I didn’t like.

Forrest Gump is my favorite movie, with Tom Hanks as an actor (played Gump), that film teach me (maybe you too) how to enjoy and love my life.

Greece is the country I have to visit before I die. Oh my Rab, they have a beautiful and very artistic country.

Hello kitty is the cutest cartoon’s character, I think..

I claim my self as an assertive and talk active person, but don’t worry, I always think what I want to say (polite or not, fine or not for others’ feeling) before I say it at last.

Jelly beans are my favorite candy!!!!!

Ka’bah is a black stone building in Mecca, and I turn in its direction when I’m praying.

Long is the height of my hair now generally. Hahahaha, I feel stupid when I write this! I don’t know whether this sentence is just coherent or not..

Mum and dad are not my highest-priority, but I wanna make them proud of me someday. I promise.

Nobody can judge me. Only God can. So, if anybody wants to judge me, I’ll keep walk away and don’t mind what they say to me.

Oh my God, this tag is crazy, but challenging!!!

Psychology is my major and I am not regret choosing this major until now..

Queen of the Damned is Aaliyah’s movie, which sent her a death, and that’s my favorite vampire movie beside Twilight.

Rats are yucky! (So?)

Sneakers are the shoes I usually wear if I go to campus. Very comfy, looks casual and simple.

Tobacco is one of my addictions. Bad addiction I know, and I’ll quit smoking before I kill my kids.. LOL.

Umm.. Shit!! I don’t know what I should write!!!!

Virginia Woolf is my favorite author. She was sick, psychopathic, but her novels are so damn great, maybe she use her hallucination when she writes them.

Woooooow I can’t believe I’m now closer to finish!!!!

X chromosome is the most chromosomes I have, as I am female, and female has XX or 2 X chromosomes, right? Open your biology’s book to make it sure.. =P

Yesterday, my mom went to Bali and she’s leaving me for 5 days, I wish she brings me something when she’s back. Amen. Hahaha!

Zulfa is my bestie’s name. I love her so much and I’m glad to have her as my super-best friend.

and now i’m tagging : helena, nitia, ajeng sekar, umi rina, ajeng, and gilang..

enjoy guys, hahaha, mwah!

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gossiping at lunch time. LOL.

This afternoon, I had lunch with my buddies, Aline and Lius, after child psychopathology’s class (and adult’s class for Aline). Lius was starving so we decided to have lunch first before we go home. Actually, my lecture wasn’t interesting me (I don’t know in Lius, but I guess he felt so), and made me sleepy. It was about mental retardation and cerebral palsy, not too exciting, they tend to be a medical problem, not psychological. I don’t want to explore them more, only on class and for the exam next week, LOL. Aline’s lesson was more interesting than ours (Lius and me), I think…

After an eating session has finished, we had a (mild) talk about a recent phenomenon, which is happening (or has just happened) around us. The dialogue’s started with talking about our friend who has umm… Like a fixation, get a stuck in a one phase of his social-life condition that influencing his thought. He seems to be never grownup, whereas he is 20s something now (older than we are). Moreover, he seems like never want to open his mind and see anything has (or to be) happened around him. As a result, he looks like a moron, ‘extraordinary’, and honestly, I have never ‘connected’ to him. I’m avoiding him. I’m not giving my (emotional) acceptance to defense myself from him. I don’t want to have conflict(s), because his pattern of behavior’s opposed to mine (and others). I prefer staying away for him even for friendship. He is more than childish you know! God!

I don’t know (and can’t imagine) how he can save his life with all of its shit(s) will happen to us (to him, I’ve nothing to him) if he stays on his current perceptual thought. Otherwise, I believe that everybody has his or her own strength(s) and way to survive. But hell, can’t he realize that everybody is talking about him, his persona, his way to think and act, and toooooo many more!!! He’s one of a loser in my faculty. It’s easy if you want to be a loser there, you should show them that you have an irrational thought, which can describe how immature you are (as your age has to be), and how bizarre your thought is, hahahah! It is not that true for real. =P

We (my friends and I) concluded that he should change his mindset or do socialization to open his mind or enrich his knowledge about this life. I don’t consider myself as the most knowledgeable person, but I think yet I’m not late to learning, and keep learning everyday, every time. Many things on earth we can use to improve our self, even things we’ve never realized before.


3 psychology’s students, had lunch together and they all know (and got an interest) about a weird thing, and use it as a topic of gossip, you can see how the gossip will appear. Our mind are contaminated by psycho-stuffs until we can’t dump them in our spare time. =D =D =D

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social support is a kind of unconditional love..

I don’t know what has driven me to write about this kind of stuff, suddenly I’ve got an interest to mention it. Well, umh, based on a dictionary of psychology, social support particularly means the physical and emotional comfort given to us by our family, friends, co-workers and others. It knows that we are part of a community of people who love and care for us, and think well of us. An important aspect of support is that a message or communicative experience does not constitute support, unless the receiver views it as such.

Most of my lectures are always ended by this (kind of) issue. Social support. Someone who has an emotional discomfort will need social support to help her/him to struggle. For example, a girl who suffering post-traumatic stress disorder after experienced a sexual-rape would be tougher to through her stressful condition if her family didn’t neglect her. How if she’s neglected? I think you know the answer.

Unfortunately, some of our populations (in our region we live) aren’t able to give any social support. They probably have given, but useless (mostly caused by their unfriendly way of talking), or they haven’t got a sense (or ability?) to understand how we feel (simpler: has a low level of awareness). I think we don’t need to be a sensitive person to know others’ feeling, we just have to care. I often read cases about mental problem that will get worse because the patient doesn’t have enough social support from people around him/her. Sad, right? The number of Mental illness’ patients increases because lack of social support too. Gaah! Hey, look! Only half patients on mental hospital have been visited by their family. I do really want to laugh after reading this fact. Me personally, always try to give some support for anybody around me, at least say to them that they’ll be ok soon.

they laugh and cry together. =)

About 2 week ago, my friend lost her momma. Her beautiful-maternal mum died from an ovarian cancer, which chronically laid in her body since … maybe 5 or 6 years ago. 3 days after her mum’s death, She (my friend) was (still) very depressed (of course she was! who wasn’t???). I often found her crying, did nothing, or did something but without enthusiasm like she does normally. My lecturer asked me what was going on with her (she found many changed behavior on my friend), she thought she’s different. Finally I told her (lecturer) about her (friend) condition. My lecturer spontaneously said that I have to give her some motivation, social support (hha!!), and always be able if she needs me. “as a friend and psychologist-to-be, we have to be sensible for this kind of problem, I think you can’t go through her and do nothing, blablabla …”, she said. “Why me? She has got 2 sisters and father, who always beside her…” I asked, not because I don’t care about my friend, but I just wanted to know the reason(s) why she said that (naughty me!). Then she continued with an answer, “Because you’re her friend, Sarah. Friends’ motivations can make us emotionally attached, and they will wonderfully help us to relieve from our sadness or another kind of negative feeling.” (Then she smiled to me, and went out from class). Yeah she’s right. I have to do all those, for her.

A couple of hours later, I met her in the canteen. I looked her smoking. I joined with her, and borrowed her light (hahahahah!). I tried to open a conversation but I got stuck. *ah shshshiiit!!!* and what an unexpected, she talked! She told me how she missed her mom so much, and so on (too long to explain). I can see in her eyes (her eyes told me too, indirectly) how terrible her feeling was, deep inside my heart, i cried. I hugged her, and she cried on my shoulder. I let her crying for a moment then gave her a glass of water. After that, we kept silent. No talk, no laugh, but I stayed my body close to her. There’s no talk again until the time to go home. Her driver picked her up and I went to the plaza semanggi to meet my high school friends. When I was at plangi, I received a message from her. “Sar, thanks for your kind and support, also for your shoulder, hehe! You know something? I can’t cry since her death, I was too shocked. And finally, I cried, fiuuh! You’ve given me a place to cry and I can’t tell you how blessed I am, have a friend like you and them (her another friends).”. I replied, “You’re welcome dear, I know it’s hard, everybody knows, but life must go on. Allow yourself to cry, but don’t stop your step after this, go go go!! I know you’re strong, we are strong, everybody’s strong..”. i told my friends to support her whatever the way is, and my friends were very welcome to do that.

Day by day, she gets better *Alhamdulillah!!!!*. And now, she can draw a smile again, she can laugh as usually, her GPA went down but she thought she’ll fix it next semester. See? Social support has just perfectly worked. Conscious or unconsciously, her circumstance wanted her to struggle, and she did it! A brief story that I’ve told you before, is a sample case about how the social support works. It’s not a sin if we do some support to our relations, it will help much, trust me.. an individualism is not a reason to stop supporting others. And I think, the happiest thing we’ve ever had is when we’re realized that everybody loves us, purely. Unconditional love. Social support is a kind of unconditional love itself. =)

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Filed under daily basis, me in me, me love friends, psycho-stuffs

DOH!!!

o’oww.. i think i’ve got a trouble. this afternoon i had a neuropsychology exam, and u know whaaaat? the type of the exam is essay, and the questions are SO FUCKING SHIT!!! i can’t finish that, surely can’t, oh i’ve tried the best on study, but what??? &$^&*$#@%!! the exam was soooo difficult, i can’t catch it.

well, honestly for the last 5 days till now, i have been having a bad day, each day must be passed by any-distract-thing, distract my mood, rob my happiness and finally, the day was spent by angry, sad, even cry and yell. i have many, many negative thoughts about myself, i become to be a pessimistic (well, uh, that’s my basic personality, my pessimism is greater than my optimism,, *sigh), lack of confidence, feel distressed, and so on. maybe i’m overwhelmed. =(

okay, back to the main topic, exam. yess, as i’ve said, those questions were burning my brain into the highest degree, i think i would get a brain dysfunction, whereas i studied about it, gagagagag, silly! how come i can’t answer most of those questions???? i’ve studied hard, mm.. not that hard, but hard enough. neuropsychology is mixed between neurology-medical-psychology subject, i’m combining the recall and recognition method to store all chapter into my short-term memory, but gaaah, it wasn’t enough, poorly. i can’t recall it successfully, just a little bit, but not all of them.

maybe i can tell you few of the questions. the 1st question that i can’t forget is about alzheimer’s disease. i have to describe it well. The symptoms, which part brain is mostly damaged, behaviors of the patient, which memory will be lost, and many more about alzh’s. another question is about umm.. non-matching-sample-test. what damage will be diagnosed if the person can perform it well? *meneketehe!!!* how can i know what the damage is, i don’t even know the truly mean of non-matching-sample-test itself!! damn it! and the last recognized-question is about schizophrenia. hhhh, the hardest and most terrified illness ever! same to the other questions, brain damage is the point of this question. i know well about schizo’s only on a psychological aspect(s), not on a neurological.

ok well i’m terrified now, exhausted, and i’m ready for any bad final result. oh God.. i think the matter is i’m on my pessimistic condition at the moment. i almost cried when i was reading the questions one by one. hell nooo.. ='(

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homework from Ayu Susanti Aditya and Ajeng

well, i’ve been tagged by my new blog’s friend, ayu susanti aditya and ajeng to write down my 100 truths. what? 100? *sigh. okay, here i go!

001. Real name → Sitti Hendrianti Sarahsita
002. Like it? → too like it!
003. Nickname(s)→ Sarah, Sarsit.
004. Status → single
005. Zodiac sign → pisces
006. Male or female → *what do u think??* female of course, can’t u see it??? LOL.
007. Elementary→ Al-Azhar 01 islamic Elementary school.
008. Middle School → Al-Azhar 01 Islamic junior high school.
009. High School → 3 High School Jakarta.
010. Hair color → dark brown.
011. Long or short → Long.
012. Eye color → brown.
013. Weight → 48 kgs, but it’s unstable, sometimes more, sometimes less.
014. Height → 160 cms
015. Righty or lefty → righty
016. Loud or Quiet → Both, depends on the situation and condition.
017. Sweats or Jeans → jeans.
018. Phone or Camera → phone.
019. Health freak → mm.. not really.
020. Piercings?→ yes, 7 in ear lobes (3 in left ear lobe, 4 in right)
021. Do you have a crush on someone? → at the moment, no.
022. Eat or Drink → drink.
023. Purse or Backpack → at campus : backpack, at mall : purse.
024. Tattoos → no.
025. Do You Like Yourself? → of course, i can’t be like this if i dislike myself.
026. Current worry? → I’m worrying about my neuropsychology’s final score.

THIS OR THAT:
027. Orange or Apple Juice? → orang juice.
028. Night or Day? → night. near to sleep. LOL.
029. Sun or Moon? → moon.
030. TV or Internet? → Both.
031. PlayStation or XBox? → Xbox, aaaarrgh!
032. Kiss or Hug? → hug. but kiss is still good. hahaha!
033. Iguana or Turtle? → turtle, i’m afraid of iguana, hihi..
034. Spider or Bee? → i’m an insectophobia, so i wouldn’t choose any of them.
035. Fall or Spring? → spring
036. Limewire or iTunes? → iTunes!!!!
037. Soccer or Baseball? → baseball, woohooo i’m a homer!!

FIRSTS:
038. First surgery → i had never had a surgery.
039. First piercing → when i was at … 4th grade.
040. First best friend → her name is Anita, my friend (used to my neighbour) since i was 4 y.o till now.
041. First Sport? → ??? running? swimming? can i say those?
042. First award → english olympic when junior high.
043. First crush → my friend in elementary school. *sorry i can’t tell his name*
044. First pet → an unnamed rabbit.
045. First big vacation → i had a tour around U.S with my family.
046. First big birthday → my sweet 17th birthday party.

CURRENTLY:
047. Eating → spaghetti carbonara. *yum yuum*
048. Drinking → coke.
049. I’m about to → study neuropsychology for the exam next tuesday.
050. Listening to → nothing.
051. Singing? → nope.
052. Typing? → this post.
053. Waiting for → the sleepy-eyed to come.

YOUR FUTURE:
054. Want kids? → totally!
055. When? → i’ll tell you if i’ve got 1! hahaha!
056. Want to get married? → i hope yea, but i’m not thinking about it now, too far.
057. When? → hey, mind your own business! HAHAHA! *the dog is barking!*
058. Where Do You Want To Live? → in the earth of course, can u imagine if i live in mars? i wouldn’t survive!
059. Careers in mind → a psychologist, kindegarten teacher, uum, a housewife? hahaha!
060. What Did You Want To Be When You Were Little? → doctor. hahahaha, ordinary one, huh?
061. Mellow Future Or Wild? → WILD, hahaha! *i don’t mind what people say, they don’t know anything*
062. Something You Would Never Try? → jump from 20th floor, drink an insecticide.

WHICH IS BETTER WITH GIRL/ BOY?
063. Lips or eyes → eyes.
064. Shorter or taller? → taller.
065. Romantic or spontaneous → romantic.
066. Nice stomach or nice arms → nice stomach.
067. Sensitive or loud → boys can’t be that sensitive, but please don’t that loud, hahaha!
068. Hook-up or relationship → relationship.
069. Trouble maker or hesitant → troublemaker. oh don’t be a hesitant in front of me!
070. Hugging or Kissing? → both.
071. Tan Skinned or Light? → tan skinned.
072. Dark or Light Hair? → whatever!
073. Muscular or Normal? → normal, but muscular is okay, as long as not like aderai. *oh geeez!*

HAVE YOU EVER:
074. Lost glasses/contacts → yea, at the beach.
075. Ran away from home → no.
076. Held a gun/knife for self defense?→ no.
077. Killed somebody → hahahaha.. funny!
078. Broken someone’s heart → i’ve tried not to..
079. Been arrested → no.
080. Cried when someone died → of course.
081. Kissed A Stranger? → hahahaha, i’m not that bitch.
082. Climbed Up A Tree? → when I was 7, or 8 maybe.
083. Liked A Friend As More Than A Friend? → no, i’m a consistent (maybe almost strict) person. friends are friends, i treat them like my friends.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
084. Yourself → hahahahaa.. stupid.
085. Miracles → yes.
086. Love at first sight → maybe yea..
087. Heaven → yes.
088. Santa Claus → no
089. Kiss on the first date → yes.

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
090. Is there one person you want to be with right now → yes. nadia.
091. Do You Like Someone? → no, at the moment.
092. Are you seriously happy with where you are in life → yes.
093. Do you believe in God → OMG u’re fucking killing me, yo stupid question!! of course i do!!! baahh!

LASTS
094. Received/ Sent Text Message → from nadia, to nadia.
095. Received Call → umm, from my dad.
096. Call Made? → to nadia.
097. Comment On MySpace? → I haven’t got any account on myspace.
098. Missed Call? → from my dad. he sought me.
099. Person You Hung out With? → nadia, ajeng.

100. post this and tag to friends. i’m tagging : cellini, karin, and evilinme

happy writing guys!!

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